To Pray Like This

Early while it's still dark, before anyone knows whether the sun will shine brightly or be hidden by clouds for the day, and a few minutes before the neighborhood rooster announces its morning, I find my way first to the coffee pot and then my favorite space to pray.

Last Christmas, two of my kids chose a book off my wish list and presented me with The Valley of Vision, a book of Puritan prayers and devotions. Often, I begin reading one of these prayers to the Lord as I warm up my own thoughts to say. 

Today was no different but the selection proved not merely a beautiful invocation to breeze through wishing I could dream up my own such prose. No, this one was not a prayer to offer without much thought; it required an honest probe inside with conviction and resolve. 

Look at this:

Holy Lord,

I thank thee that many of my prayers
have been refused -
I have asked amiss and do not have,
I have prayed from lusts and been rejected,
I have longed for Egypt and been given a wilderness.

Go on with thy patient work,
answering 'no' to my wrongful prayers,
and fitting me to accept it.
Purge me from every false desire,
every base aspiration,
everything contrary to thy rule.

I thank thee for thy wisdom and thy love,
for all the acts of discipline to which I am subject,
for sometimes putting me into the furnace 
to refine my gold and remove my dross.

Deliver me from every evil habit,
every accretion (increase) of former sins,
everything that dims the brightness
of thy grace in me,
everything that prevents me taking delight in thee.*

I stared at the words and read them again. These confessions are so God-centric; more about a humble understanding of God's character than a disappointed (fit-throwing?) child who hasn't gotten her way.

 When was the last time I prayed like this?

I mean, have I thanked the Lord for intervening and preventing me from marrying the boyfriends I thought were a sure thing? Absolutely! Many times, over the years, in fact.

But what about this week and last month? What about the things I want right now and am, in fact, begging God for? Do these requests reflect a desire for Christ's character to be developed in me or the person for whom I'm asking? Do I wish for God's kingdom to be built and advanced through the circumstance; for Him to be glorified in it? 

The proper response is to consider what's underneath these petitions. Might I be asking amiss or appealing from my own lusts or selfishness - not in harmony with God's will? If so, I must repent. Will I then thank Him if He refuses, trusting He always has my best interest at heart and also those I pray for? 

If not, I will wait. Waiting is good. Hard, yes, but it does deep work that is necessary for a genuine faith. Recently, I took up the challenge to pray this way: "Lord, I know you're never in a hurry. So, I'm just going to leave this here with you. You take your time. Do with it what you think is best when you want to. I trust you." 

Oh boy! That didn't come out quickly or easily, but the more I practice, the more comfortable it becomes. Our God is trustworthy with everything that concerns us. 

How do I know? Paul tells us in Romans 8:31, 32: 

If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son 

but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?

Make no mistake, when one has put their trust in Jesus and taken up a permanent place in God's family, you can ask for anything in prayer. Feel free. But as we grow to know Him, our prayers should reflect that understanding and ultimately, His heart for us as His children.

I think I'll just sit here awhile as I shape my own prayers today from this springboard, grateful for the challenge to remember to whom I'm speaking - a heavenly Father, full of steadfast love, wise in all His ways.

*Valley of Vision, p.138, 139

The Hugger

 Do you remember those old Pier 1 Imports commercials - usually popping up during the holidays - sporting the theme "find what speaks to you"? In each fifteen or thirty second spot, the selected products would "say something" charming and cute to the female shopper (why always a woman I wonder) and she would scoop up the irresistible item. One of my favorites was a stuffed owl I think that when making eye contact with the shopper, said, "Careful, I'm a hugger." and in the next frame, she was hugging it and taking it to the register. In our home, I would immediately side-eye to my husband with a silly grin, he would predictably roll his eyes, our kids giggle. Good marketing.

Last weekend I accompanied my husband to his high school reunion. He graduated from a very small private school, so we expected an intimate gathering. I didn't expect to know too many. I don't mind sitting on the periphery taking the opportunity to be more of a spectator at events such as these; a lot can be learned by observing.

One man in particular caught my attention and held it most of the night. One of my husband's childhood friends, a stocky, burly fellow I've seen at many get-togethers over the years. This particular night this friend with a big heart greeted each classmate as they arrived, or as he noticed them, with a hug. Not a half-felt side hug, but a full on, head down, bear hug. Everyone got one - including me - who he only knows as my husband's wife. I happily received it. He then, with steady eye contact, asked, "How are you?" taking all the time in the world to hear their answer.

As I watched each exchange, I was immediately convicted in my heart from a passage in the Bible I've been studying this summer in the book of Philippians. The Apostle Paul teaching:

"So, if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Phil. 2:1-4

In my Bible I have written next to this passage: I should show love, compassion, and tenderness - that I've experienced from Christ - to others without reserve or discrimination. 

My husband's friend nailed it. He demonstrated love without reservation or discrimination. Everyone felt the love he had to give, and I think it's safe to say that his love originated from the love he, a longtime Christ follower, has experienced in Jesus.

Also, in my notes: This should mark all my relationships. **needs work**

Lesson learned, be a hugger.

Summer Splurge

We seem to have passed the half-way point of summer. It's funny how everyone has an opinion about the speed in which time goes. Those who dream of the heat all year long lament "it goes too fast." While those who can't stand the humidity and high temps are dreaming of a pumpkin spice latte and sweater weather right about now.

I don't like to rush any seasons because I love the beginning of each one and usually ready to see them go too. I know they'll be back. That's the beauty of living where I live, we get them all - with gusto. So I don't mind letting each one show off its glory and also do its work even if uncomfortable.

Which brings me to why I'm writing today. Just a quick post to recommend a book. I mean, we all need a great summer read, don't we?

One of my goals for 2023 is to revisit and reread the books that have marked my faith journey of three plus decades. Some are classics and some are newer publications. All have challenged and changed my life. In January, I scanned my bookshelves and easily grabbed about twelve titles and stacked them on a chair. Every month I read one or two and reminisce.

A few weeks ago, I laid eyes on one hardcover that makes me swoon whenever I see it always remarking, "I love this book so much." I knew I had read it at least twice, but when opening the cover was surprised to see in my handwriting 2017, 2018, and 2019. Wow, three times! 

I remembered an author I dig who claims to read several favorite books every year for reference and reminder. I'm usually skeptical of this kind of thing, worried I might get sick of reading one too much, kind of like overplaying a song, you know?

Still, I couldn't resist. I hadn't read this favorite author in a few years, so I decided to indulge. Even told a few people who think I'm weird, "I'm going to treat myself to Mark Buchanan. I haven't had his voice in my head in a while."

Spiritual Rhythm is about seasons. Both physical and spiritual. The brilliant author blends them both in a way that makes this seasonally obsessed soul well, obsessed! It's funny when you read a text repeatedly how it hits you a different way each time (different season maybe?). Also, hello Bible, I'm looking at you too.

Anyway, I could go on and on, but if you're looking for a descriptive, instructive, delightful, and deeply insightful volume on what each physical season of the year looks like - winter, spring, summer and fall - and what you should do (and not) during its turn on the calendar pages, I can't recommend this enough.

And, if you dig faith-based books, MB masterfully connects the spiritual seasons of the heart with beauty and in ways that are very helpful in understanding our lives especially as we grow older and want to get the important things in the right order.

A lot of words up there to basically say, for (maybe) your final summer splurge, treat yourself to this book. Read it slowly. Savor it. Put it into practice.

And by all means, message me and tell me all about it.

You may find yourself in need of this trusted companion over the years as you move from season to season in your spiritual life. 

An Easter Gift for You

This Easter weekend is so tricky, isn't it?

To live "in the story". To pay attention.

Like today for example: Silent Saturday. It's a sacred day. We would do well to rest, as God and Jesus did, as the disciples, the women, all the Jewish folk observed Sabbath rest. Be still, be quiet, wait, watch. Trust. Don't worry or fret. No mindless chatter or activity.

Yet here I am, doing laundry, changing over winter curtains to spring/summer, running over to church to set up for tomorrow's Resurrection breakfast, hanging wreaths, prepping coffee pots. Next, I'll run to the store to make sure we have all the fixins for Scott to make his "famous" lemon pie (aka Joanna Gaines' famous lemon pie), his new empty nest hobby.

I was still this morning for a few hours early. I finished my Lent devotional. I prayed. I thanked God for the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I thanked Jesus for dying on the cross for my sins. I marveled that He raised Himself from the dead and lives today. I cried a little when I thanked Him for being my Savior and inviting me to join His family. For my secure position in it.

I have a few cards on which I've typed a series of statements that I review and state aloud in prayer a few times a week. A practice of "preaching the Gospel to myself". I've often heard messages encouraging this but wasn't sure how to go about it - so didn't for a long time - but often wondered if I was missing something important.

At the end of every year, I become the most annoying member of our family, like clockwork. I virtually chase everyone around inviting (alright, alright, insisting) each grownup consider taking on something new, or letting go of something unnecessary or unprofitable, or perhaps adding a spiritual discipline (birthday gift for Jesus, maybe?) in hopes of placing themself in a position for spiritual growth for the next twelve months. (Notice I never call it a new year's resolution or goal - nobody digs that.)

What made this past New Year's different, was that my grown kids were home in my house. 24/7 access. Can you picture it and feel their excitement? This time I had an extra request of them. I asked for their input into one of my NY endeavors. I asked my three and their spouses, "What book(s) have you read that really marked your faith? You know, helped you grow and consequently respond in such a huge, line-in-the-sand kind of way that you recommend them to others or refer back to them again and again?" I want to read what they are reading. 

One title was given by all three of my kids. Turns out it was required reading when they attended Word of Life Bible Institute. It's a small, ancient little thing - A Gospel Primer for Christians by Milton Vincent. 

I found a copy in a basket of devotionals next to my morning chair, dusted it off and began in January. Part 1 is 31 readings called Reasons to Rehearse the Gospel Daily and Part 2 puts them in a brief list form which this Type A listmaker is most grateful for.

I was hooked right away and I tell you I understand the Gospel on a much deeper level now though I've been walking with Jesus and studying the Bible for 39 years. AND I get what preaching the Gospel to myself means practically and have a list in which to do it! Finally!

This list has enhanced my prayer time in many ways; what I talk to God about, what I ask Him for, what I don't need to ask Him for, and simply my level of gratitude and understanding. So good! 

As if all this wasn't thrilling enough, as I was making these discoveries, I said to my husband, "I wish I had a laminator so I could print these out, laminate and keep in my Bible." 

You're not going to believe what he said.

"The church has a laminator." 

My whole life changed in that moment. 

So did his.

Obviously, I can't print and laminate all of you a copy, but if you're interested in this game changing practice of preaching the Gospel to yourself every day, I'm just going to leave this list here for you. 

Read it regularly. Read it slowly. Maybe only a few lines a day. Really let it sink in. Change the pronouns so that it becomes prayer. 

I guarantee it will get you out of any funk you find yourself in, bring you encouragement on your worst day, change your complaints or entitlement to gratitude, take your eyes off self and put them on Jesus and others, give you a clear understanding of who God is, how He feels about you and what your purpose is, and just overall fill you with the fullness of joy Jesus died to give you. 

That is what we're celebrating this weekend, isn't it?

Happy Easter, dear friends. He is Risen!

Preaching the Gospel To Myself Everyday

My God is immense beyond imagination. He measured the entire universe with merely the span of His hand.

He is unimaginably awesome in all of His perfections, absolutely righteous, holy, and just in all of His ways.

He has also been unbelievably good and merciful to me as the Creator and Sustainer of my life.

Every breath, every heartbeat, every function of every organ in my body is a gift from Him.

Every legitimate pleasure I experience is a gift from His loving hand to me.

All that I am and all that I have I owe to Him and to His goodness.

My life in every way is, and will continue to be, utterly dependent upon Him in whom I live and move and have my being.

This wonderful God is the most supremely worthy Object of admiration, honor and delight in all of the universe.

He has created me with the intention that I might glorify Him by finding my soul’s delight in Him and by living in joyful obedience to Him in all of my ways.

Yet I could not have failed this great God more miserably than I have.

Instead of giving thanks to Him and humbly submitting to His rule over my life, I have rebelled against Him and have actually sought to exalt myself above Him.

Going my own way and living according to my own wisdom, I have broken countless times either the letter or the spirit of every one of God’s Ten Commandments.

Thinking myself to be wise, I have shown myself to be a fool; and because of my arrogance, God has every right to damn me to the everlasting experience of His terrifying wrath in the lake of fire.

So as for myself, apart from Christ I am bound by the guilt of my sins and also bound by the power of sin, enslaved to various lusts and pleasures.

Apart from Christ, I am so utterly deserving of and destined for eternal punishment in the lake of fire, completely unable to save myself or even to make one iota of a contribution to my own salvation.

However, what I could not do, God did – and in doing it, He did it all, sending His own Son into the world to die on the cross for my sins, thereby showing me unfathomable love.

God loved me so much that He was willing to suffer the loss of His Son, and even more amazingly, He was willing to allow His Son to suffer the loss of Him at the cross.

Jesus loved me so much that He was willing to lay down His life for me. No one could ever love me more or better than Jesus.

On the third day after Jesus’ death, God raised Him from the dead, thereby announcing that His death was completely sufficient to atone for every sin that I have or will commit throughout my lifetime.

God then exalted Christ to His own right hand, where Christ now reigns from on high, granting salvation and forgiveness to all who call on Him by faith.

Now when my time came and I placed my faith in Jesus, God instantly granted me a great salvation.

He forgave me of all my sins, past, present, and future.

He made me His child, adopting me into His family.

He gave me the gift of the Holy Spirit, who gives me God’s power, who pours out God’s love within my heart, and who tenderly communicates to my spirit that I am a child of God and an heir of eternal glory in heaven.

In saving me, God also freed me from slavery to any and all sins.

I no longer have to sin again, for sins’s mastery over me has been broken!

In saving me, God also justified me, and being justified through Christ, I have a peace with God that will endure forever.

In justifying me, God declared me innocent of my sins and pronounced me righteous with the very righteousness of Jesus.

God also made complete peace with His future and present wrath against me by Jesus, who bore it upon Himself while on the cross.

Consequently, God now has only love, compassion, and deepest affection for me, and this love is without any mingling of wrath whatsoever.

God always looks upon me and treats me with gracious favor, always working all things together for my ultimate and eternal good.

God’s grace abounds to me even through trials.

Because I am a justified one, He takes mastery over every trial and forces it to do good unto me.

When I sin, God’s grace abounds to me all the more as He graciously maintains my justified status as described above.

When I sin, God feels no wrath in His heart against me.

His heart is filled with nothing but love for me, and He longs for me to repent and confess my sins to Him, so that He might show me the gracious and forgiving love that has been in His heart all along.

God does not require my confession before He desires to forgive me.

In His heart He has already forgiven me; and when I come to Him to confess my sins to Him, He runs to me (as it were) and is repeatedly embracing and kissing me even before I get the words of my confession out of my mouth!

God does see my sins, and He is grieved by my sins. His grief comes partly from the fact that in my moments of sin, I am not receiving the fullness of His love for me.

He even sends chastisement into my life; but He does so because He is for me, and He loves me; and He disciplines me for my ultimate good.

I don’t deserve any of this, even on my best day; but this is my salvation, and in it I stand.

Thank you, Jesus.

Live in The Story

Today is Palm Sunday, the beginning of Holy Week. Some of you know this because you've already been engaged in this sacred season through fasting, praying and giving to the poor these past six weeks.

But this week things are ramping up. Can you feel it? Today, we remembered Jesus' triumphal entry into Jerusalem on an appointed donkey. He sat on the lowly animal and rode into the busy city while the crowd erupted into 'messianic joy' as one author put it. Men, women and children waved palm branches and laid their cloaks down for the donkey to trample over, a king's welcome. That's something. It would seem they knew who He was and what He could do for them. The Old Testament prophets said it would happen this way.

I walked that downhill road four years ago when I had the tremendous privilege of visiting the Holy Land. It's a narrow path, not like American parade routes two car lanes wide. No, anyone on the street could probably have reached out and touched Jesus if they wanted to. I want to.

What especially struck me this morning as I listened to my favorite Preacher read the familiar Bible verses was that Jesus received all the praise and affection and joy from the multitude knowing that every single person waving their branch, shouting their cheers would turn on Him - some violently - in the next few days. All of them.

Still, He loved them. Loves them. Loves you. Loves me. 

He willingly died for all sins - past, present and future. 

Jesus factored in all of my sins before He ever offered salvation to me, and I said yes. Ah, this is why we need sacred holidays and times of remembrance. 

My husband invited our people to live in The Story this coming week leading up to The Big Day, Easter Sunday. Something significant happened each day in Jesus' life this Holy Week so long ago. He overturned tables in the Temple, He washed His disciples' feet, He spoke last words, He prayed, and so much more. 

Now, I'm inviting you too. Enter the narrative every day. It's not hard to do. Read the Gospels. Stop at the end of each day. Pick it up the next. Consider where you would have stood. Participant. Spectator. Worshiper. Scoffer. Believer. Doubter. Feel the emotions. 

We can all do it. We should. Feel the weight of Jesus' suffering - and His willingness to take it upon Himself because of love for you. Remember the cost. Believe the love. Consider your response.

Go to church services. Especially Good Friday and obviously, Resurrection Sunday. There's no more important place to be, I promise.

There's a lot to think about between now and then. If we're going to give it the weight it deserves and an appropriate response, it's going to take some time. I hope you will join me in clearing out needed space and turning down distracting noise and unnecessary activity to live in The Story this week and ask God to show you the wonder in something new or something familiar.

 I'd even love to chat with you about your findings.

P.S. The songs! Listen to the songs. For those of you my age and older, dust off those Sandy Patti cd's. Play them loud and proud. Sing with gusto. Was it a morning like this? Who will call Him King of Kings? Unshakeable Kingdom, anyone? How about I've just seen Jesus? All of them!

If you're really hip, you can just ask Alexa to play them. She'll do it. Ask me how I know.