Time Is On Your Side

It is no secret that we live in a hurry up world.  We expect fast results and are never really willing to wait for anything.  I mean can you think of the last time you heard someone say when they finally get waited on in a crowded restaurant or long line at grocery store, "No worries, I'm not in a hurry" with a smile and not sarcasm?  I'm as guilty as the next guy.  A true student of the culture.

As per usual, when we are able we watch Andy Stanley's live service on Sunday mornings.  This week we were able to tune in before we left for church.  I was so encouraged by the message I wanted to tell you a little about it.

Many of you know that our family is in a season of waiting. The parts of the message (there are too many to note here) that resonated with me were regarding time.  Get this:

I learned that "when you are in pain physically or emotionally, you become self-absorbed.  It's the natural reaction to pain.  Self-absorbed people make self-absorbed decisions."  Basically, when you are in pain you are not healthy but you don't have to stay there.

"When you are healthy, you have clarity.
When you have clarity, you make better decisions.
Until you  have clarity, you have no business making decisions.
Clarity takes time."

Here's more:

"People God used in a historical way almost all had a Round 1 (a failure - something they've done or something that's been done to them) then a Round 2 with an interval of time in between.  In every single instance there was an interval of years."  Think Moses, David, Paul.  Which one of you wants to sign up for that?

I know, not great news, right?

Bring it down to us, basically two groups of people.  The ones who navigate their Round 1 well, wait for God allowing Him to prepare them for what's next.  Then there are the people who think that time's a wasting, they've waited long enough, learned their lesson and are sure they'll do better next time without waiting.

For the sake of being positive, let's talk about the results from the first group.

"There is always more time in the in-between than they're comfortable with and when they come out on the other side and get to the next thing, 2 things emerge in the gap:

1.  A divine sense of destiny
2.  An abiding humility

They say things like, 'God is up to something in my life and has a purpose for me.'  and even, 'I wouldn't trade anything for what I learned.  I am a better person for what I took away from it.'"

I've met people like this and I bet you have too.  They inspire us to deeper character don't they?  They know through their experience of waiting what we want to experience right now.  They've learned that time is our friend not our enemy.

Andy went on to teach a verse many of us are very familiar with.  Romans 8:28

And we know that in all things, God works
 for the good of all those who love Him, who have been 

called according to His purpose.

In other words, if you and I are willing to take a deep breath and allow Him to, God will work through that thing we wish would go away.  If we allow Him to use all those 'things', they will potentially benefit us and someone else.

But if we don't allow God to use all things, all those things will come back to haunt us and He won't redeem and bring value to them.  This is a mistake.

He said, "The common denominator in all of your mistakes is you.  You follow yourself around.  Wherever you go, there you are."  Funny, but true - let's just own that.

All we have to do is love Him - which means to surrender to His way not our way recognizing that He is God and we are not and His will is more important than ours.

God can leverage purpose out of our 'anything' if we invite Him to.  That's so great!  Did you need to hear that too?

And didn't you LOVE the part of how it will eventually benefit someone else?  That's so purposeful.

Would you excuse me? 

I have to go pray.

*All quotes from Andy Stanley

You can listen to the whole message - and I pray you take the 37 minutes to do so HERE

Surviving The Letdown

I have a question. Why the letdown?  You know how you look forward to something for awhile, plan for, possibly pray about it and generally just live off the energy of anticipation?  Then the glorious day/event (or events) happens, you thoroughly live in and enjoy the moment(s) but when it's over - splat!  You come crashing down from the high.  

I wouldn't exactly characterize myself as a thrill-seeker.  I don't ride amusement park rides (mostly for dizzy/equilibrium issues).  I take few risks.  I like nesting and routine.  I don't pursue adrenaline rushes.  So when I do experience this it often happens at Christmastime or should I say after Christmas - shocker!

But here I sit.

This whole month has been filled with fun activities, each one requiring some measure of preparation - a.k.a. a list or ten.  Not the least of these included:

• Easter (greatest holiday on the Christian calendar) 
• one college son able to hitch a ride home to celebrate with us 
• a delicious, totally splurging non-'January eating' meal that my thoughtful mother-in-law initiated (do I need to mention Easter candy?) 
• a short but sweet road trip south with two of my kids to visit a college
• throwing my son's fiancee a bridal shower that almost all of my favorite women attended
• hosting Brittany's family who I hadn't yet met in our home
• speaking to one of my favorite MOPS groups about marriage and parenting.  

Phew. (That's just the highlights - I didn't even mention my birthday was in there too.) Sounds like a lot, but I loved every minute of it.  I was born for this.

Then Tuesday happened.  The house was back to three of us, the clouds and cool air reappeared, my calendar emptied (for awhile) and I found myself smack dab in the middle of letdown or a meltdown or down in the dumps. Whatever you want to call it.  I really hate this place. Often I know exactly how to get out (usually prayer and focus on God and gratitude - not self), but sometimes it lingers.  And depresses.

I spent the day fighting negative feelings and accusing self-talk when I remembered what a friend recently said to me about the Christian's enemy, Satan: "He fights dirty. We've got to be aware and not give him so much power".

Too often I don't give him the 'credit' for wreaking havoc on my soul.  It's so much more spiritual to blame myself and my never ending supply of weaknesses, right?  Not really.  Not according to God.

Realizing I was standing at the crossroads of making a wise decision or not, I reached out to God, the lover of my soul (and yours) for help.  I prayed something like this,  

"I hate this darkness I feel.  I need something and I know better than to go anywhere else but to You to get it filled. (This the result of years of Holy Spirit teaching about substitutes that only soothe and comfort temporarily usually leaving consequences I never wanted in their wake.) Lord, you know me better than anyone else, will you give me what I need to get through today with hope and joy?"

Then I warmed up a corn bag, grabbed a book and blanket and curled up on my comfy couch watching the rain outside my living room window.  I read a little, drank some hot tea, and even fell asleep for a few minutes.  The dreary day droned on.

Some time had passed when I got a text from a friend.  "Are you free for dinner tonight?  I've been wanting to take you out to dinner for your birthday."  I considered what I must look like (hair day #3, no makeup and wearing old sweats - you know I'm down if I'm wearing sweats all day) and my gloomy attitude.  Not the best company.  Maybe I should postpone until I feel up to it. 

That my friends, is a self-focused foolish woman's response. I knew it immediately.  I recognize the fingerprints of God all over this. He has heard my cry and sent a life preserver.  So I accept with a warning of the aforementioned considerations to which she responded, "Throw on a pair of jeans and I'll pick you up at 5:30."  I hadn't even mentioned the sweats - does every woman do this?

I ate three different kinds of fish, was sung to by the wait staff (the birthday lives on!) and was loved by a friend. Of course it was just what I needed. God always knows what I need. 

He knows what you need too.  We can miss it if we're not paying attention or inviting Him in.

Are you having a gloomy day or week or month?  Have you succumbed to negative self-talk or false accusation?  Before you consider or continue self-pacifying, why not try running to God as your first option?

He's promised to be your best need-meeter (Phil. 4:19) because He knows you. He formed you in your mother's womb before you were born and is aware of all your days (Psalm 139).

He loves you.  Believe it.  And remember this is not dependent on what you've done or haven't done but on Him and who He is.

Don't lose another minute - reach out to God who is waiting for you.

"Therefore, the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you....blessed are all those who wait for Him."  Isaiah 30:18

Road Trip South

For ten years, we traveled south for Spring Break.  I miss those days.  Packing up and heading to where the sun shines is always so welcome in April.  So when Ally and I got invited by Ally's friend Sarah and her mom to visit the campus of Liberty University in Virginia we said yes.

There's nothing like a road trip.  It may or may not be all about the food as you'll soon see.  Either way, I have pictures of our adventure.

First part of the week, I went to Syracuse to speak to a MOPS group about marriage and raising kids.  I love doing this so much. The moms were eager to hear some good news - like that they will survive this season of parenting.  They will.

I stayed over and then raced up to the Adirondacks to grab Ben.  I figured he may as well take a look at Liberty too.  And I wanted to spend some more days with him.  Because I'm his mom.  And I miss him.

I saw a tip about packing I decided to give a try.  Since six of us were cramming into a seven passenger van, we were politely asked to pack light.  The tip was to put each outfit into a large ziploc baggie and coordinating jewelry in a smaller one.  Take a look.

 It totally worked.  I squeezed 4 outfits, 4 pairs of shoes, my toiletry bag and a few other things into a medium sized bag.  I'll be doing this again.

After one hour of driving (phew!), we were hungry for breakfast.  Everyone around here stops at Krispy Kreme.  It just so happens Drew's dorm is minutes away.  Coincidence?  I think not.  He had a few minutes before his first class, so came down and had a donut with us.  I just never get tired of seeing all three of my kids together.

The picture on the right is of our Liberty crew.

After awhile back on the road, it was time to introduce Ben to the movie Frozen.  Can you believe he hadn't seen it? 

A quick stop for gas is where I saw these giant pickles.  Thought they reminded me of Scott and me.  Sportly and Sassy.


 Or maybe not.


We also ate at Chick Fil A and Sonic.  You have to when you're down south.





The campus is gorgeous and huge.  I don't want to admit to how many times I got lost. We enjoyed some beautiful warm sunny weather and loved seeing some pretty colors too.

Of course, we technically were there to check out the college.  Ahem.  This is convocation.  Chapel.  Thousands of students gathering to worship and hear the Word of God preached.  It was quite something to take in.  I loved it. We ran into many of the kids friends.  It's always fun to see familiar faces.

We attended many admissions sessions.  Eventually I lost interest (shocking) and took to people watching.  Scott would have lasted much longer. This guy in front of me clearly had checked out as well.  I wanted to know what he was listening to in the worst way.  Ben wouldn't let me ask.  On another note, aren't these the cutest sandals?  Pre-birthday gift.

We also got to go to a football game on campus.  It was exhibition but still fun.  And one of us won a free t-shirt.  They were being thrown into the crowd.  I didn't exactly catch it, but it was coming straight for me when the dude in front of me snatched it right out of my hands. Not cool.  I think he felt badly about it because he turned around and gave it to me.  As he should have.

A bit of an over-smile but the kids make fun of how I smile in pictures. They yell at me and I get nervous.  Then this happens.  They might need a spanking.

Saturday morning we awoke to my birthday.  No big deal, of course.  I met the kids for breakfast.  The food on campus was pretty good.  Resident students say it's always better on College For a Weekend.  Works for me.  Had a custom made veggie omelet.  

 

Then Ally wanted to take some selfies of us.  This is the new thing in case you live under a rock.  Kids don't make or buy you a card anymore.  They make a frame of pictures and post it on instagram.  I'm not complaining - I got one from each of my kids and I loved all of them. 

 

Scott was kind enough to give me some pre-Birthday love letting me have some gifts in advance like the much anticipated new MercyMe Cd.  He rocks.  Scott, that is. Well, the CD does too.  You'd better get it.  You won't be sorry.

Still, it was kind of weird being away from home and away from him and Drew for my birthday.  These two sillies made up for it. 

 Not too old for a little cuddling on mom's lap.  Actually, it was kind of painful.  One of them is very boney in a certain area.  Not mentioning any names.

I guess they are not too cool to still walk like this with me too.  I like that.

It was a great weekend.  I don't know if either of them will end up at Liberty, but I sure liked checking it out with them.  I thought they might ditch me for all the fun and for the students they roomed with.  So I was quite surprised to get lots of time to hang out with them. I thanked God for each moment.

All good things must come to an end and  I was ready to get home to Scott.  Later that night I read one facebook message after another and found a stack of birthday cards waiting for me.  I thanked God for giving me a beautiful life.  I'll never run out of things to thank Him for.

And now we have begun Holy Week.  The last days before Easter. We have so much to celebrate.  I'll have more to say about that.  Stay tuned.