Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Grateful not Grumbling

Here it is Thanksgiving week. Probably the time of year we are most aware of the need to be grateful. If you are a mom, you are especially sensitive to raising children who have a tendency toward thankfulness – especially with overindulgent Christmas right around the corner. Sometimes I wonder, though, if we only emphasize this attitude in November and not the rest of the year.

Certainly our culture is not teaching thankfulness as a state of the heart. I think I’ve figured out our problem. What is the opposite of gratitude? My best guess….complaining. We can never be grateful if we are prone to grumbling. It’s easy to detect in children – but let’s turn the magnifying glass around to ourselves. How do we as women measure up? Do we see the glass half empty or half full? Is everyone and everything against us or do we recognize the hand of God at work in our lives? Not sure which camp you’re in? Ask the person closest to you and insist they be honest!!

I looked up some of these words in the dictionary and here’s what I found:

Complain – bringing a grievance or resentment
Grumble – to murmur or mutter w/discontentment; to make ill-natured complaints; to growl or snarl in deep tones or low sounds

Yuck. Am I the only one out there pegged by that truth? Keep reading – it gets better!

Gratitude – thankfulness; kindness awarded by favor received
Contentment – satisfaction; habitual satisfaction; freedom from dissatisfaction, anxiety or agitation

Felt any of those symptoms lately? Anxiety. Agitation. Dissatisfaction. Wouldn’t you like to be free from those negatives? I know I would.

I have good news. “Being grateful is a choice – not a feeling based on circumstances. It reflects a humble, self-forgetting attitude. Your focus is on either what God has done or hasn’t done. Contentment has nothing to do with what’s going on in my life and everything to do with what’s going on in my mind.”*

Being thankful is a learned response. Train yourself in it. Remember that God has allowed everything in your life for our good and His purpose. (Rom. 8:38) Recall all the blessings He has showered into your life. Nothing comes to you or me unless it has passed through His hand. His mighty Hand. We can trust that He is good and He is for us because that is a constant theme running through the Bible.

Never forget that He didn’t invite us into relationship with Him to make us happy – rather to make us holy – set apart to Him. He is drawing us to Himself because He loves us! Just the phrase “to Himself” – that He wants us near Him - should excite us!!

“If we don’t believe that we are deeply dependent on God for all we have or hope to have, then the very spring of gratitude and faith runs dry.”*

Some of you are saying, “Yes, but life is hard. I’ve been suffering. I’ve experienced a lot of pain and loss. How do I overcome all that and become grateful?” I hear you and I am sorry for what you’ve experienced, but God has made a special provision for those of us in this situation. It’s called a sacrifice of praise. In other words, when we can’t come up with it on our own, we sacrifice to praise. We lay down all the hurts and praise Him anyway.

Psalm 50:23 “He who offers a sacrifice of thanksgiving honors Me.”

“Why is it a sacrifice to give thanks to the Lord? Because being thankful forces us to take our eyes off ourselves and put them on the Lord. Giving up our self focus is the kind of denial that pleases God.”*

One thing I know for sure (from my experience and that of my children’s) is that we are never more miserable (not to mention miserable to be around) than when we are focused on ourselves, expecting everything to go our way or others to behave in such a way that will satisfy us. Or when we have to have what we want when we want it. Ugh.

v Proverbs 19:23 “The fear of the Lord leads to life; then one rests content, untouched by trouble.”
v 1 Tim. 6:6 “Godliness w/contentment is great gain…”
v Phil. 2:14 “Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God, without fault in a crooked generation.”

I like the concepts up above better and would rather have them describe me: freedom from dissatisfaction; a self-forgetting attitude, content.

So, as we celebrate Thanksgiving and prepare for Christmas, I’ll leave you with one more passage from Hebrews 13:5 in the Message version “Don’t be obsessed with getting more material things. Be relaxed with what you have. Since God assured us, “I’ll never let you down, never walk off and leave you,” we can boldly quote, God is there, ready to help; I’m fearless no matter what. Who or what can get to me?”

Now that’s what I’m talking about. What more is there to be grateful for? Happy Thanksgiving, faithful reader. I pray you have a peaceful, contented, restful, self-forgetting holiday that’s totally satisfying!!

*Quotes from “Thanksgiving A Time to Remember” by Barbara Rainey